The Enemy Within

Betrayed by your own body. 

This is the thought that came to me this morning as I recalled the reason I was up late last night. 

My little girl suffers from a tic disorder, not a blood sucking insect, but a repeated, involuntary movement. It has been under control for some time now, however, it came back with a vengeance last night. She came to me with tears in her eyes and a look of defeat on her face and said, "Mommy, I am so tired, but I can't get to sleep. I have 3 tics going on at the same time and if I try not to do them, it hurts."  "What can I do to help?," I asked. "I don't know," she said, "probably nothing."

Heart breaking words.

I thought about the other people I know whose bodies are not in alignment with their wishes - more than wishes - with their deepest desire and need to be made whole again - to have their bodies and minds restored to God's intended design.

The enemy within. 

Definition: An invisible agent doing its best to make itself known to the world through side effects and symptoms.

What does it look like? Does it have features - bulbous eyes and long, dirty fingernails? Is it slime green or fire engine red? Does it smell like sulfur or decay? Is it calculating or does it just run amuck in a drunken stupor of destruction? Is it a loud mouth or does it do its work ever so quietly. Where did it come from? Was it invited? Did it happen by chance - a cosmically unfortunate luck of the draw?

I know that I am anthropomorphizing sickness and disease (giving it human characteristics), but it seems so much easier to visualize the enemy and the ensuing fight when it has a face -even a made up one. We as humans know how to fight one another - having been doing it successfully for years - and even make believe monsters to some extent, but how do we fight a germ, a cell gone bad, a system out of whack? How do we make things right again when everything we throw at the enemy seems to fail?

I don't have that answer. But I do know this. There is something I can do with the experience of my suffering, of my child's suffering. 

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows."

2 Corinthians 1:3-5 (NIV)

The truth is that no one is exempt from suffering. Also the truth, the knowledge that when it comes, we can seek comfort from those who have gone through suffering before us. Suffering, sickness, disease are here to stay, but so are hope, compassion and comfort - given to each other as a precious and costly gift, given by God.

"Why do you say, O Jacob,

and complain, O Israel,

"My way is hidden from the LORD;

my cause is disregarded by my God"?

Do you not know? Have you not heard?

The LORD is the everlasting God, 

the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He will not grow tired or weary,

and his understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary

and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary,

and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the LORD

will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not be faint."

What did I do for my daughter last night? I sought the Lord out loud so that she could hear my hope in the Lord's ability to help her. I rubbed her forehead with a gentle touch and sang her songs from my childhood. Songs my mom would sing to me, even if the occasion was rare. The power of that comfort remained with me and I gave it to my child. I sang "You are my Sunshine," "Hush, Little Baby" and "Jesus Loves the Little Children" over and over again. She got a small smile on her face and her eyes softened. She settled down and it wasn't long before she was sleeping.

Comfort.

Strength. 

Hope.